simplepuzzle | It's been a while....

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It's been a while....

It's been five years since Chuck left. Left his home, left his dad, left his dog, left Raleigh.

And he hasn't looked back.

Because if he looked back he'd have to think about what he's left behind and if he thinks about it he'd have to do something about it. But it didn't work and they tried, they tried so hard. And it didn't make a damn bit of difference, so Chuck...throws himself into school. And he tries.

Occasionally, he tries to date. A girl here, a guy there. Every time he tries to make an effort at a relationship it ends with a lot of anger. Chuck's not really good at this. Nothing's compared to Raleigh, and Chuck's not sure he'll ever have something like it again. And he refuses to settle.
Love isn't everything. Chuck focuses on school. It's okay.

And he's good. He's really good. That and the occasional one night stand satisfies him.

And then he gets a call from Herc. Yancy's been in an accident. He's broken a few limbs, and he hasn't woken up. Herc isn't saying he should come back, and Chuck's been staring at Raleigh's number when Mako calls him.
He needs you.
Come home.

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It’s really starting to grate on Raleigh and when Chuck plays asshole, he sort of sags, flashes him a grateful look and a mumbled thanks.

His question sort of throws Raleigh though, and he looks thoughtful, brings the cup to his lips and takes a long pull and swallows, shivering as the hot liquid burns its way down his throat and into his stomach. Tastes good, and it takes the bitter edge of his life away temporarily.

“Come just for the sake of coming? I did that first year, after you left for school. It was – fucking awful, standing out here alone in the cold. After that, I started volunteering to just run the booth. This time of year, it just hasn’t been the same—“

Since you left.

And now it’s even worse, with Yancy in the hospital. It’s like someone was conspiring against him to ensure that the holidays were the worst time of year that they could be.

Yeah.

Chuck looks away, guilt stabbing him a little in the belly. They're both feeling responsible for each other's misery, and it's sort of terrible.

He passes a hand over his back in response to the thanks, touch light enough that he might not even feel it through the layers. "The wine's helping," he offers, mouth quirked in a partial smirk. They probably aren't meant to be sneaking as much as they are, really.

But there's a look in Raleigh's eyes, if not fully on his face, that's telling Chuck how miserable he is. "Hey." He nudges him with his elbow. "New year in two weeks. New start."

They're really not supposed to be drinking like they are, but seriously Raleigh gives about zero fucks right now. Chuck's hand passes over his back and even as light as the touch it it feels like Chuck's burning him through his coat and he has to clamp down and suppress the shiver.

He can't stop himself from leaning a little closer, automatically adjusting his posture to be more open towards Chuck, more inviting.

"Yeah, so they say," he says quietly. New Year, new start. Sure. "Are you -- sticking around for that?"

[ooc: realized you can't drive cross country in one day so uh he flew in at some ridiculous time of night/day and then rental car'd it to town yeah]

"Yeah." Chuck's in Raleigh's space as much as Raleigh's in his. "I'll be here for new year's." he's planning on leaving on the third or the fourth; he hadn't actually bought a return ticket when he'd flown out here, he has to get on that.

"Do you have any plans?" And they shouldn't hang out, that dinner proved that. But it's sounding like Raleigh might stand Chuck's presence and help a little easier.

The lighting time is growing nearer, and the crowd around the booth is thinning in favor of getting closer to the tree, and Chuck's only looking at Raleigh.

[ ooc; lmfao i didn't even notice WORKS FOR ME ]

There's fewer and fewer people around and that means two things: Raleigh's attention is only on Chuck and he can snag as much hot wine as he pleases.

"No, no plans. We could--" He pauses, looks over at Chuck, meets his eyes and sort of shifts his weight on his feet and licks his lips.

"If you wanted, we could do something. I mean, Rock Hall isn't that exciting-" not like California, "but there'll probab;y be fireworks, a party or something."

"Yeah." He hadn't meant as a couple, but a party. A party could work. "We could hit a party."

The wine has him warm, flushed, a little floating. Raleigh's eyes are bright in the Christmas lights that are strung over the trees and stands. Chuck leans on the counter, facing Raleigh.

This is bad. This is dangerous, and Chuck can't seem to pull away.

The tree lights come on to an appreciative sound from the crowd, and the lights reflect off of Raleigh's face and it's six years ago and Chuck is curling his hand over Raleigh's jaw and leaning in to kiss him.

The lights of the tree come on and he's not looking at it, it's not important because Chuck's right here, right in front of him and he's all light up and his skin glows from wine and he's leaning in to kiss him and Raleigh meets him halfway, hands lifting to frame his face, head tipping into that hand.

He's a little scruffy, a little shadowy since he hasn't shaved since early this morning and he can feel Chuck's hand scrape over it and he leans closer, drops an arm and circles it around his waist, pulling them flush together.

Under the wine and the cider Raleigh tastes just the same as he did five years ago, kisses the same as five years ago.

Chuck kisses him like there's all the time in the world, like he's leaving tomorrow and is memorizing every detail of his mouth and face.
He strokes Raleigh's jaw and throat with his thumb and leans back, pressing his forehead against Raleigh's.

"Sorry," he mumbles, though if he was really sorry he'd pull away from him.

It's a slow, languid kiss and Raleigh takes his time in relearning Chuck's mouth, tasting the cider on his tongue, licking the last drops of it from his lips. He holds him tight, bodies pressed tightly together and when Chuck breaks it and rests their foreheads together, Raleigh doesn't let him go.

"Are you really?" He murmurs, eyes half lidded, gaze fixed on Chuck's mouth.

"A little."

He presses his palms to Raleigh's shoulders. He wants, he wants so much he's aching. "Raleigh." He murmurs his name against his mouth and kisses him again, teeth scraping over his lower lip.

People pass, glance over and keep going -- seems like they're having a 'moment' and no one wants to break up something that Raleigh might actually have going for him.

(even if this may, in fact, not be good - might be the worst thing in the world, but whatever.)

"Shh."

Raleigh's not sorry, not at all and maybe Chuck's just saying that, because he's kissing Raleigh again, saying his name and Raleigh knows he's in so much trouble, he's lost again in Chuck and he just--

kisses him again, spreads his palms on Chuck's back, keeps him close, warmth settling around his heart.

He's sorry. But not because he doesn't want to kiss Raleigh, he's sorry for the pain this is likely to cause the both of them.

But oh, dammit, Raleigh feels good and all he wants to do is press him and kiss him and maybe get out of the snow. And it's going to hurt so much so soon.

And Chuck is considering going home with Raleigh that night and someone should probably intervene.

If anyone intervenes Raleigh is going to punch them in the nose.

"Come home with me," he murmurs quietly, lips still brushing against Chuck's. "Please. Just for tonight."

Fair enough.

"...really, really shouldn't," he mumbles, leaning into him and rubbing the back of Raleigh's neck.

"Please," he says again, drawing Chuck tighter, closer. Fuck, it's an awful idea but Raleigh needs him, wants him and he kisses him again and again, mouth nothing from lips to ear where his breath is warm on cold skin.

"I'll light a fire...remember the fireplace? I'll fuck you slow, thorough, right in front of it...so deep, Chuck. Let me love you, please."

Raleigh's words send a shudder through Chuck and he can't stop the faint moan as he leans into Raleigh.

"So...bad an idea..."

But he remembers Raleigh fucking him in front of the fire, remembers the warmth and the filth and the soft laughter and he wants. "Twist my arm," he growls, nipping lightly.

"I know."

It is, it is but oh, Raleigh wants him so badly he can taste it - literally. His mouth occupies Chuck's, tongue licking it's way back in easily, swallowing that growl and muffling it with a quiet moan, hips rocking against his. He's hard - painfully so - and he clutches at Chuck like he's going to fall without him.

"We'll snag a whole gallon of this wine," he tells him, backing Chuck up against the table. "Take it back, drink in front of the fire and then I'll swallow you whole, make you feel fucking amazing..."

He's already grabbing under the table, picking up a bottle and sliding it in his jacket.

"Lets get outta here."

Chuck growls quietly and sticks a hand in Raleigh's pocket, up against his side and following him closely.

"I don't think either of us are good to drive," he breathes into his ear, nuzzling his neck gently, and he's doing this before he can think, before he can talk either of them out of this. "Wanna walk?" Or is it too far to keep their hands off of each other, too far to not sober up and change a mind on the doorstep?

"Cab," he decides, rolling against Chuck before kissing him again, teeth nipping at his lip.

It's easy, really - Raleigh knows a lot of people and a quick text later and they'll have a cab in five.

"Quicker. C'mon, babe."

He's going to climb into the back of the cab and practically into Raleigh's lap.

It's a mistake, it's one of the bigger mistakes he's made in the past few years it he can't seem to stop, and Raleigh is so warm and familiar under him and it's not as though he ever stopped loving him.

And he's murmuring it against Raleigh's mouth, "I love you," in a desperate whimper, holding onto Raleigh. "Never stopped, fuck." Well maybe once or twice, when he was angry and hurt and alone.

Raleigh's gonna pull Chuck into his lap and ignore his buddy who happens to be driving them (he's averting his eyes, so at least they're not being gaped at) in favor of clinging to Chuck, clutching the fabric of his jacket and kissing him, inhaling the meaning behind the kiss, behind the words.

"I love you," he breathes, "so fucking much. Christ, I need you--"

Raleigh never stopped loving Chuck. Even through all the hurt and pain and the loneliness, he never stopped.

It's not a long drive - Mike the driver seems to sense the urgency and he drops them off at Raleighs door and doesn't bother charging them, and Raleigh helps Chuck out, clutching at his hand and lacing their fingers together as he brings him inside.

Chuck's too distracted, sorry cab driver. He'll hit you up later.

He's got a tight hold on Raleigh's hand as he follows him in. There's something he needs to remember, but he's taking off the borrowed gloves and peeling himself out if his coat. He'll remember it soon.

...and indeed, it's coming to him as he drops his coat and pulls Raleigh into his arms again, pressing his mouth to the corner of his jaw. "We're drunk," he mumbles into his skin. "We've been drinking and you're--in a really bad place--" his words would hold more weight if he wasn't kissing down his neck.

Raleigh sets the bottle he snagged down and drops his jacket as well, arms immediately going back around Chuck, hands dragging up his back to slide into his hair.

"Should we stop?" He asks, breathless, head tipping back as Chuck's lips dampen the skin of his neck, Raleigh's fingers digging into his back.

He doesn't want to stop.

He doesn't want to let go.

He wants to guide Chuck into the cozy den, put him on the couch, and light a fight, and make slow, desperate, passionate love to him right in front of it.

They're moving to the den slowly, kissing and touching and shuffling. Mostly shuffling.

Chuck is kissing down his neck and sucking on the hollow of his throat. He's shuddering under his fingers and pressing desperately against him. "Mprobably," he mumbles, pushing Raleigh down on the couch and leaning down to keep kissing his neck and jaw and mouth.

He'll let Raleigh up to light the fire in a moment.

Raleigh finds himself pushed down on the couch with Chuck in his lap and God fucking dammit he is so conflicted because really, Chuck's right, they shouldn't do this, they've been drinking and it's a terrible idea and what if Chuck's mad in the morning?

It's all kind of negated though; Chuck's kissing all over his neck and jaw and his mouth and Raleigh's losing himself in it, hands wandering, pushing at Chuck's shirt, bunching it up to slide his hands underneath, fingers still cool from the outside air.

"Tell me to stop," he whispers against Chuck's skin, cheek pressing to his temple as his eyes close and the room spins cheerfully, "and I will."

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